Buzz From The Boards: Venting About Your Spouse

buzz from the boards
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WIVES! When you and your husband are in a tiff, a major fight or if you’re on each other’s nerves – who do you turn to to vent? Nesties weigh in on who their go-to pal is when they need to get advice on their martial frustrations:

“I do usually vent to my mom and it usually backfires.  She’ll pull the very serious, ‘are you two ok?’ And I want to scream and be like ‘YES!  We just fought about whether to make an apple or a pumpkin pie. Seriously, no big deal!’ I usually go for venting with girlfriends/wives/whatever of his friends because they’re in pretty much the same boat and then it’s more like laughing over it than being mean and crying and emotional.” – kss20

“A friend. There is a difference between venting and being malicious. There is nothing wrong with venting about small annoying things to friends.  However if the issue is more serious you could still talk to a friend but the tone and type of conversation would be different. I would rather a friend hold a grudge then a parent.” – tiffanysbride

“I don’t talk about my marriage to my family, I think it’s too close for comfort. I did talk to them when my husband and I were having crazy issues with his parents though, but only because it was such an awful situation and I was pregnant and beyond stressed out. It was nice because they supported both of us and were able to sympathize without bashing my husband’s family, which is important to me and my husband. I don’t really vent to anyone about my husband now, which is probably why I post here [on The Nest community]! I’ll tell my sister a couple of things, but only if they’re minor.” – Leftie22

“I will usually vent to a friend, one who actually doesn’t live too close to us.  She listens, and gives me advice.  Not always advice that I want, but she has been through a lot and I know that she isn’t going to go gossip to any one I really know about it. Once in a while I will [talk] to my mom, she is very much about keeping a marriage afloat.  I try not to complain about too much to her though, since she talks with my sisters and everyone else. I don’t like lots of people knowing my business… But hey, we gotta vent sometimes…” – cloudymeatballs

“My sister. Or my friend. I trust neither of them will blow it out of proportion. My mom… If I turn down an offer of a sandwich she thinks I have an eating disorder. So, she gets nothing from me when it comes to marital spats.” – JemmaWRX

“If it’s a stupid vent about my husband it’s usually my mom or maybe my friend. My friend and I vent about everything to each other but lately she has been one big pity party, and no matter what I say, her situation is worse. If it’s a very serious issue, like one that my husband and I worked out recently, I do not say a word [to anyone]. I do not have anyone [in my life that] I feel is non-judgmental enough to handle things that big. It’s nobody’s business anyway.” – CowgirlK39

“I usually vent to my mom. We are extremely close and she is not judgmental. Plus, when it comes to venting about my husband’s family, I go to her since she had been on a worse boat than I have about in-laws, so she understands what I go through.” – smbenevides1989

“I don’t vent about my husband. If he’s frustrating me, I tell him. I do talk through my thoughts with friends sometimes, but it’s so I can articulate myself clearly when my husband and I do talk.” – anssett 

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