How to Deal With a Suffocating Sister-in-Law
Photo: Jupiter Images / The Nest
Let’s face it: Girls don’t often play nice. But what happens when one of those “girls” is a grown adult who just so happens to be your spouse’s sister?
While mothers-in-law are one thing, a relationship with your sister-in-law can be even trickier to navigate. It seems that mothers are often all-too-eager to see their sons marry and start a family of their own. A man’s sister, however, is often portrayed as the stubborn sibling who’s unwilling to share her beloved brother with his fiance.
One reader over at our message boards voiced her frustrations regarding her suffocating sisters-in-law (you read that right — there are two of them!):
“My husband and I have been through a lot. We went from living with his mom when we were dating to being able to buy our own home after I got out of college. But now that he’s moved out and we have our own home, his sisters are much ruder to me and start drama all the time to try to get him to leave. I have a little girl from a previous relationship, and they’re trying to use that to their advantage. How do I get them to leave us alone?” — LivvysMomma21
Other community members from The Nest boards responded with their advice:
“He definitely needs to stick up for you and your relationship!“ — MiniMugLinton
“When this began, he should’ve spoken up and told them to cut it out and not do it again…this is a husband problem, not an in-law problem.” — TarponMonoxide
“Just to give you some hope, when my husband and I first got engaged, my sister-in-law threw a huge fit. He told her to grow up, basically. Six years later, we are now actually pretty good friends. But I didn’t force it; things just worked themselves out.” — WendyGR
“It’s his responsibility to say something, not yours. You and your little girl are now his primary family — he took that on when he said ‘I do.’ Anyone who attacks that (extended family included) has to be dealt with so your nuclear family is first and foremost.” — JulesFo
How is your relationship with your sister-in-law? What problems have you encountered with your spouse’s family?
Plus more from The Nest:
A Field Guide to Mothers-in-Law
Gifts That Will Win Over Your Mother-in-Law
How to Shut Down Your Mother-in-Law
CasaSugar
Simply Stated
The Bump blog
The Knot blog
The Married Chick on MSN Living
Wedding Channel
My sister in law boycotted our engagement so much that we decided to elope. She had turned his entire family against me. We’ve been married for nearly two years now and I’ve found the best way is to just be as nice to her as possible and bitch about it to my hubs who understands, LOL. She’s slacked up for sure since we’ve been together but I still hear about things she’s said about me every now and then. I just had to stop trying to get her to like me…stop WANTING her to like me and just be nice. Maybe 15 years from now things will get better. Until then we’ve found our way.
I should do the samething… it is even worst in my case because they are twin so it is a very delicate subject for me to discuss with my husband because sometimes he doesnt want to see how serious the issue is.
Well, c’mon! I always though it’s the mother-in-law that wreaks havoc. Never heard about sisters fussing around.
Sometimes I think the sisters can wreak more havoc than the moms. Soon we’ll be hearing nightmare brother-in-law stories!
No you won’t because guys are not that catty. I am a girl, but I know how impossible girls can be.